Have you identified some of your family patterns?
Do you often feel stuck in life, and can’t seem to move forward?
Do you struggle to change bad habits?
Everyone has ‘baggage’ they carry from their family of origin.
Often times you’re unaware of these family patterns and you’re just caught up in the cycle without being aware of how they are affecting your behaviours.
On this journey of getting to know yourself you have the opportunity to view your family patterns from a neutral viewpoint.
The environment in which you were raised and the people involved influence how you view yourself, others and the world. As you explore your family’s rules and traditions you gain a better understanding of yourself. You can explore the communication style your family used and how they expressed anger, managed conflict and the way in which they showed affection, and so on.
The Story of a Boy
Once I met a boy who was raised by a narcissistic Father who has an abusive Father himself. The boy was nearly 20 years old now and he couldn’t figure out why he had this mean streak towards the people who were closest to him. He would meet a new friend, sometimes even a girl, and he would be very critical of her and tell her she was wrong and he was right – about everything and anything! Sometimes she would be crying and very upset and he just didn’t know what to do!
The boy was taught certain patterns during his family upbringing and it’s difficult for him to see them, but a huge motivator is the way he is feeling. He feels bad about hurting people, and so he wants to change that.
He has a few positives traits he learned during his upbringing and one of those is to be resilient and know that things can get better. This is an excellent foundation from which he can grow new ways. He starts to search for way to get better and discovers an incredible workbook on personal development that will help him get to know himself more deeply.
He explores his family of origin and the family patterns more deeply. He explores his own thought patterns, attitudes and core beliefs. He goes deeper and deeper until he reaches that AHA moment that feels like a LIGHT BULB has turned on in his head. He finally understands!
Once this understanding comes he puts in places positive changes to his thoughts and transforms his core beliefs – so that instead of reacting with an ego towards people his nature is more soft, gentle and with empathy and understanding. Occasionally the old pattern comes up but as it tests him again and again he gets stronger.
Two years later the man is engaged to a woman he is deeply in love with.
The positives we have received from our family of origin can be identified as a foundation from which to grow. At times we might need to improve that foundation to ensure its solidity and strength – and to expand consciousness and positively improve your life.
Want to Explore Your Patterns?
(Sometimes I’m in China, so please allow a few days for reply due to the firewall.)